Today I lost a large majority of what was left of my hair. Well, I didn't lose it - it was all over my bathtub floor and my towel. I knew as I washed my hair that this would probably be for one of the last times. It didn't make it any easier. So I cried a little and then I declared to myself, "This is the day that the Lord has made. I will rejoice and be glad in it;" and then I cried some more. I'm such a girl.
I warned my boys that today mommy would be wearing a scarf on my head as I walked them to school. We talked about the fact that their friends might ask them why I have a scarf on. Micah said he thought I might look like a genie. We laughed and thought that was a pretty fun way of looking at it. Jon just said that he would tell his friends my medicine makes me bald. Nothing like childlike simplicity.
I donned my very lovely scarf that matched my track suit quite nicely, if I do say so myself. Told myself that I could do this and walked out the door with the boys. I had already told my friend Andrea, who called to check on me, that I might need some emotional support. She was at the ready. I took the plunge, I went out in public with what felt like a neon sign flashing - cancer patient; and I survived. I posted my scarf-wearing, smiling picture on Facebook and am ready to take the next step with a haircutting party tomorrow night. I want to cut it off while there is still some to cut and end the torture of the morning shower/hair drama. Plus Jon even commented that my hair was in his sneakers this morning, so it's time for my hair to get off my head and off all of the other surfaces in my house. I'm embracing bald. I am holding onto joy. I am trusting God to be the glory and the lifter of my head as He has promised in His word.
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